parentalwars

Competition Induced Simplicity! The time of year had finally come, the end of the lazy days of Summer, the end of milling about and doing whatever one wanted. The First sign of the season dying manifested itself with the start of the martial competition known throughout the land as soccer. The High Prince had finally reached an age where he could compete in such endeavors, and was excited to prove himself a worthy opponent. Also, or so he thought, he would be able to use these battles as an excuse to not eat his meals. But he did not plan for his mother's ingenuity, for she foresaw these tests fast approaching, and had planned accordingly. Before setting forth from the great keep of the Dragon King, she prepared what she could beforehand, and tasked the servants with setting up things to be ready to cook when they arrived home. The plan was brilliant, but would it work? Only time would tell. Upon arriving home, the Queen began the final preparations for the meal. One which s

This night was going to be a turn in the battle. Things were dragging along and not looking so good for the Dragon King and the Queen of Night. The High Prince had chosen hunger and sleep over even attempting a single bite. Therefore, the Dragon King decided on a new tactic. He would have the High Prince pick the meal for the banquet from those that the Queen of Night was prepared to make. Seeing the brilliance of this plan, the Queen presented the High Prince with the options available. This decision was not one to be taken lightly. The High Prince listened carefully and thought about each meal. He asked what was in each one, knowing that these meals would be made over the course of the next week since the Queen always prepared for a week's worth of meals and nothing more. "This Beefy Pizza Muffins dish...Will that be like the pizza I like to eat, mother?" the High Prince asked. "Very similar, but it does have ground beef in it." "I pick that one. It

The strange tale of Beef! The Dragon King once again summoned his progeny to the banquet hall, preparing himself for another long night of negotiating, begging, and crying. Lately the High Prince, the Princess of Dragons, and the "Spare" Prince had been working together again, trying to play off one another, attempting to weaken the King's resolve. The festivities of the week had only strengthened the King's determination, his ego goaded into epic proportions due to the very nature of the jubilee! Befitting of the continued deliquesces, the Queen of Night prepared a new meal for her King. Beef with cheese topped with fresh bread. A feast designed to win over the King, while not inciting a revolt in the offspring. It was a good plan, well thought out and quite effective. All she had to do was allow the children to cover the dish in their favorite condiment, ketchup and they would eat it. Or so the Queen hoped. At first, the meal seemed a success, for the "S

It was the weekend of the Dragon King's birthday. Well really it was the weekend before and this was the start to his week of birthday festivities for all the kingdom was required to celebrate their king's birth in some way. The Queen of Night had prepared a giant cookie shaped cake for everyone to enjoy on the first day of the festivities. As part of this celebration, a peace treaty was formed. The Dragon King and the High Prince reached an agreement that there would be multiple days of meals not prepared by the Queen of Night, but during this party, the High Prince would not ask her to cook for him either. "Son, the Queen has been very busy preparing for this day's celebration for the past week. She is tired and wishes to join in the celebration instead of this constant war we have. Let us both not ask her to prepare anything extravagant this day so that she may relax," said the Dragon King. "I agree, father. Nothing that she isn't used to preparing

The Lesson in the Potatoes Once again it was time to engage in the never ending rebellion. The High Prince had already decided long before the feast that he was not going to eat. His decision made, it was time to fight the battle. The Queen of Night displayed her hard work on the table, immediately forcing the High Prince into his negotiating tactics. In the beginning, the Dragon King fell prey to the continued distraction while the High Prince stalled. Finally, the Dragon King had reached the limits of his patience. "Son, enough negating. Eat your meal before it gets cold. Again, you have until the bells chime to eat three bites." The High Prince stood his ground, his choice already made. "No father, I will not. This meal is not fit for peasants. I will not touch it." The Dragon King only shook his head. "We've talked about this before. There is a action, and a consequence of that action. Are you sure this is what you want?" "Yes, I refuse.

Chicken Soft Taco Failure! Once again, the time had come for the banquet feast and for the High Prince to be tortured. However, this time, he knew his fate. Before he even saw the food, he had decided that tonight he would refuse. It was time for him to stand is ground. Tonight, would be the night. Cheese and Chicken Tacos. The battle grounds where drawn. The Indomitable will of the Dragon King against the unending loathing of his first-born son. The drums of war beat their somber song. Both his siblings surrendered immediately, without any sort of fighting, their will breaking under the gaze of the Dragon King, his temper already pushed to its limit by the day's trials. "Son," the tyrant began "This will taste better warm. It's chicken and cheese, in a soft shell. It's great! Please eat it." The High Prince, preparing for the sacrifice at and, stood his ground and didn't even look at the meal. "You have thirty minutes to eat or you're

Johnny Marzetti Casserole! The darkness of the Dragon King's rule still spread across the land squeezing the life out of his subjects. The High Prince and his siblings still struggled to rid themselves of their father's evil. Once again, they gathered in the banquet hall, and once again the High Prince prepared himself for the battle at hand. Would his siblings join him in his righteous crusade, or would they fall to the vanity of hunger and tasty food? Soon he would know, for the Queen of Night approached, meals in hand. The High Prince looked upon the feast with pure disgust. What sort of trickery was this? His favorite noodles, covered in cheese, with the flesh of slain cattle. Such blasphemy! "What is this heresy?" the High Prince complained! "This looks horrific!" "My son," started the Queen of Night, "these are the noodles you enjoy, with cheese, and beef. You should eat it before it gets cold, I promise you would like it.&qu

Porkageddon! The ongoing rebellion continued in the realm of the Dragon King, his first-born son raged onward concerning the idea of "fair," particularly concerning the ideas of what and how to consume food. The Queen of Night continued her onward trend of trying new meals and cooking new and interesting banquets for the King and his heirs. The meal in question tonight was the meat of a freshly slain pig and potatoes, smashed by hand. The Queen had worked hard on this meal, expecting no resistance from the heirs because of the potatoes. It was one of their favorite foods. Or so she thought! Surprisingly, the High Prince took the first bite without issue. Would this mark the end of the struggle? Had the Dragon King and the Queen of Night finally won, crushing all rebellion? Of course not! The High Prince started his negotiating immediately after tasting the first bite of cooked pig. "Father! How about I eat the potatoes, would that fulfill the required limit?"

The battle starts with the Dragon King absent. He has been called into a summit meeting with the Royal Treasurers of the realm leaving the Queen to manage the tiny tyrants on her own. In his absence she saw fit to make a meal she felt sure would please them, homemade chicken nuggets, french fries and canned peas. The peas were optional, made simply because she did not want to eat the fried potatoes, but if the High Prince decided that the fries were not the correct type, he would also be forced to partake of the peas. It was a meal that the Queen of Night had never made and was uncertain that it would turn out edible, hence the french fries, but in reality the chicken was quite delicious. It tasted even better with the ketchup the High Prince loved to smother other foods in. The "Spare" Prince would eat none of the nuggets though, sensing his siblings dislike of the looks of the food. He ate only the french fries, but his desire to please his Queen led to him picking and

Honey Mustard Conquests Some time had past since the High Prince began his rebellion. What had started as a simple "No" turned into a country wide rebellion against the Dragon King and his Queen. While some headway was made by the High Prince, his siblings had turned against him, falling under the tyranny of their father. The Dragon King's treasures where vast, and his ability to buy back the loyalty of his offspring broke them from their rebellion. Still the eldest Prince held firm. His suffering only empowered him farther. His father's evil deeds must be brought to an end! The time was right, this time the High Prince would win. The Queen of Night had prepared a dish of freshly slain poultry and fresh corn, in anticipation of the return of Dragon King. The fresh scent of crushed Mustard and the finest salts steamed out from the kitchen.The High Prince smelled the food and prepared his defenses. Today he would stand his ground and be victorious! Now was his chan

Treachery comes in many ways. Defiance against food has led to other means of combat. While the King of Dragons is away, the little ones try to break the will of the Queen of Night. "We can do whatever we want!" they seem to think. Breakfast and lunch are not monitored in the way that dinners are and this has led to a mutinous behavior of all the rules of the land. The bathroom has been the most recent battle front. Perhaps it is not in the way that you may think. There is not excrement found in places where it should not be. On the contrary, in many cases they attempt to clean up the Princess of Dragons's plastic throne. In many cases this results in the death of many trees or a load of hand towels to be washed, but the efforts there are not a battle for today. Those efforts earn praise because of their desire to make the Queen happy. However, one porcelain throne room is off limits. This one, the ruler's private quarters have been off limits from the day the D

After two grueling battles and one that was sure to come, the Queen of Night began to prepare for the battles to come. She was unwilling to compromise on the foundation she had already built. There were meal plans already in place to keep the health of both the King and Queen at an acceptable level. This had been something accomplished since the conception of the Princess of Dragons and had become the lifestyle of the household. These plans were what kept the Queen of Night in control. She needed them in order to survive the onslaught of children and life itself. She was unwilling to bend just because the offspring didn't like the way it looked. For years the King and Queen had been eating these meals and mostly enjoying them. They lost weight and kept a healthy lifestyle through them. She would not change to unhealthy means just to get the rebellion to eat one meal as a family. With this in mind, she began sifting through recipe after recipe looking for something suitably healt

Chicken and Rice Reckoning! The realm enjoyed a relative peace. The High Prince's righteous rebellion had been halted, left alone as his younger siblings fell to the iron might of the Dragon King. The Queen of Night had used her fool magics to trick the younger children into actually liking the food she made. Deflated, the Prince sat with the King and Queen in the banquet hall, his meal in front of him. "Father, if I consume all the foul meals for the week, would you still honor your promise of a reward?" The High Prince dared ask, still holding out for his opportunity to release himself from the slavery his parents held him in. "Yes, son, of course! Clean your plate for the next six days and I will honor our agreement." The Dragon King hissed, his putrid villainy pouring from his lips. "But as always, three bites is what is required of you without punishment!" "Yes father, I know!" rebuked the Prince. He looked for support from e

The struggle of Cheeseburger Casserole Out of Character: It's tough to see in the picture but Cheeseburger Casserole is basically cheese, turkey, bell peppers, and potatoes. A normal human being would add in some hot salsa and it's super tasty. However, in the pictures, there is a metric tonne of ketchup and shredded cheese to help mask the horrific taste of food apparently. The Dragon King returned from the day's work, and the Queen of Night had prepared one of his favorite dishes. The flesh of his enemies, mixed with the spicy delicacies from far off lands, a grand feast for a king as mighty as he. Knowing what was coming, the Dragon King entered his banquet hall prepared for war. However, much to his surprise, the Spare Prince and the Princess of Dragons had already consumed a reasonable amount of the feast. The smile displayed on the Queen of Night conveyed a sight that warmed the reptilian heart of the King. No joint effort to rebel against them from the two y

The Struggle to Resist Chicken Enchiladas! It was a dark time for the empire. The High Prince had seen the plight his father's rule spread across the land, and has risen up against him. How dare the Dragon King demand his offspring eat the meals prepared by the Queen of Night? What tyranny is that? The High Prince, determined to stand his ground, once again stood defiant against another meal: Chicken Enchiladas! The demands of the Queen of Night were too much to bare: consume three bites of the enchiladas. Not nibbles, not a small taste, but three full on bites! The despotism of this demand was absurd! How dare she demand such vulgar acts? The "spare" prince was first to fall, his lack of understanding his undoing. The food tasted good. He couldn't hold back, his baser desire to consume tasty food outweighed the obvious oppression forced upon him by the Dragon King and his evil Queen. The Princess of Dragons fell next. At first, she stood strong with h

Rebellion begins with Tacos!?! It always begins with a spark. A small, weak, bit of tension that, through hopes for the future and the dreams of tomorrow, starts a roaring fire that burns through the lands and changes history. Our story is no different. It was a dark time, a time of horrific tyranny and forced labor. Of horrendous atrocities such as chores, bed times, and bath times. The Dragon King ruled his kingdom through fear and hatred. However, in his compliance, the King grew fat with compliance, in the thought that his rule was absolute. The High Prince, his motives true, saw the compliance and the villainy of the Dragon King, and knew he must take action. So the High Prince, backed by the the Princess of Dragons, stood firm and in the quiet piece of the evening, openly rebelled against his father, the King, and the Queen. The first act of defiance: dinner! The Dragon King looked upon his family with disdain for the hatred they bore. Tacos? How can his lineage hate such a

Dramatis Personae Below you will find a current roll of the war heroes, villains, and innocent bystanders of the war between the parents and their spawn! The Dragon King : The arch-villain in this story. This foul beast has ruled his kingdom with an iron fist, and forced the nobles of this land into slavery! Also, commonly referred to in the kingdom as Daddy. The Queen of Night : The Slayer of dreams, the enforcer of rules, the destroyer of all that is happy in this world. Also known as Mommy The High Prince : The first born son of the King and Queen. The most valiant of heroes, the high prince cares about the land, it's people, and the dreams of living a free life of unending play time and doing whatever he wants, when he wants. The Princess of Dragons : The only daughter of the dynasty. She has taken up the mantle of joining her eldest brother in open revolt against the tyranny of the Dragon King. Also good at misplacing key items and instantly crying. The &qu